Help?

So it's April 19. Let me say that again, NINETEENTH. That's really really super late. Okay, sorry about that. I'm having what I prefer to call a minor breakdown. Maybe it's my fault for not keeping track of my cycles. I never really have even though I know I really should. I know that I had a period sometime after Febuary 17 and before the 28th. That week in there somewhere. I don't remember how long it lasted or if it was a normal cycle. I don't remember thinking it wasn't, so I'm guessing it was. So that leaves all of March and now 19 days of April with no period. Nada, none, not even a little. I'm in the process of getting a doctor and making an appointment for a blood test. But I'm nervous. I know what they're going to ask...
"When was your last cycle?"
"Was it normal?"
"Do you normally skip cycles?"
I DON'T KNOW. I just don't know.
I'm absolutely terrified. I don't want to go get another home test because two of those came back negative. I don't want to think that I am with my whole mind, because I don't want to be disappointed. I don't want Dan to get his hopes up too high, because I don't want him to be disappointed either. I don't want to have to worry about work and what if I can't if I'm pregnant. I don't want to have to worry about how we're going to afford a baby on one income.
I love babies, but I know next to nothing about how I'd raise one. I love the idea of breastfeeding. I love the idea of babywearing. I love the idea of a water birth. I just don't know. I've wanted a baby my whole life and now that it's a possibility I'm scared to death.
Please, anyone who may be reading this, help.
I don't know how, I don't know what I need, I just need help (And I don't ask for it often..).
Amanda